Mother-in-law’s domestic work creates problem – The Denver Post

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Dear Amy: My in-laws are in town. They are staying at our apartment.

Thankfully, my husband and I are able to stay at my parents’ place while my own folks are away, because our apartment is too small for four adults and three animals.

My mother-in-law is cleaning and doing our laundry at our place while we are at work.

That’s nice, but my husband isn’t single anymore and I feel uncomfortable that she’s doing that.

Also, she wants to cook him a roast and potatoes for dinner. I don’t eat either of these things, so is it rude to cook my own meal?

I feel a little overwhelmed by it all, but I can’t say anything because he hasn’t seen his parents in almost a year.

Am I being ridiculous?

— Young Wife

Dear Wife: Yes, you are being ridiculous. But this brand of ridiculousness is often brought on by the presence of in-laws, especially when they are staying in your home.

You sleeping elsewhere is a lucky break, because your mother-in-law is trying to make herself at home — and be helpful — in your home. If you were cohabiting during this visit, your reaction about boundaries would be somewhat justified.

Cleaning and cooking are how your mother-in-law is expressing her gratitude for the visit. She is trying to mother both of you, and you would be gracious to accept her efforts.

Ask Amy: Mother-in-law’s domestic work creates problem

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